My KISA and I proudly finished the Tough Mudder in Tahoe on Saturday. They sent us the map of the course the night before and I made the unfortunate mistake of reading it before we went to bed. Mind you, the trip to Tahoe took 6.5 hours because of traffic and stopping for dinner, so by the time I was reading this in the hotel it was 11 pm. And we had to get up at 5 am to leave for the race. I learned the course was 5.25 miles straight up a mountain and then another 5.25 straight down. The elevation at the peak was going to be 8500’ and I was all too familiar with altitude sickness from our trip to Colorado to hike a 14’er. Oh, and did I mention there would be 19 flipping obstacles?? Needless to say, I didn’t sleep very well that night. The thing I was most concerned about was my knees. I’d iced them many times since the 10 mile run on Thursday and even iced them before I fell asleep Friday night. When I woke up Saturday morning I realized no amount of ice was going to make my knees not be swollen.

When we left for the shuttle pickup it was 44 degrees. Yes, Fahrenheit. My KISA and I had contradicting ideas of what the temperature for the day was going to be: he thought it’d be in the 90’s according to his weather apps and mine told me low 70’s. So, we didn’t really know what we were getting ourselves into.

The start of the race. You can see the uncertainty on my face.

We got to the race pretty early as we wanted to get back to the city to go to a show later that evening, and we had no idea how long the race was going to take. Or if we’d make it out alive. (Yes, you literally sign a death waiver as people have died from such events.) They had a 7:40 am heat for the first wave, so we decided to get in the 8 am heat (the heats went every 20 minutes after us as well). I think my first dose of reality was as we were walking up to the starting line and you had to climb a wall to even get to the start. And, that didn’t even count as one of the 19 obstacles. FML. My second non-scheduled obstacle was when they asked all of us to kneel for 10 minutes while they explained the race course to us, paid tribute to the fallen soldiers, and gave us our pep talk. After about two minutes my “kneeling” turned more into a hunched-over half sitting position as I realized my knees really weren’t going to make it through the race. As we were about to start the announcer made us all take note of a huge divot in the ground to ensure no one broke their legs at the start of the race. This was becoming all too real.

The race started and my KISA somehow talked me into doing a walk/run for the course, which we continued throughout. I was kind of surprised at how easy it actually was for me, given the altitude and steep inclines. Maybe I really was tough.

Finishing Electric Eel

Our first three obstacles were before we even made it to mile marker one. The first one was an obstacle called Glory Blades. It’s essentially a slightly slanted wall you have to climb over. I was pretty proud of the fact that I made it over with ease and no assistance. Ok, this isn’t so bad. Our second obstacle was called Kiss of Mud. As I saw the man spraying a fire hose of freezing cold water onto a pit I realized why it was called Kiss of Mud – you army crawl through mud with barbed wire above your head through a pit. Now, it may not have been so bad if it was actually mud. The problem with being in the second heat is that it was more like wet, hard ground, with lots of rocks and debris. I could feel my legs and arms being cut up as I dragged myself across the freezing cold, hard ground. When I made it out, my KISA was standing there with a huge grin on his face and gave me a high five. I think it gave him hope that maybe I’d be ok throughout the race. The last one we came to before the completion of the first mile was called Arctic Enema. I don’t really understand enema part, but I definitely understood the arctic part. You get into a tank filled with water and ice. Ok, at first I didn’t think that would be so bad because I was covered in cold mud and at least it would clean me off. What I didn’t realize until I stepped into the tank was that halfway through there’s a board that forces you to go underwater with barbed wire over the top of it to ensure you can’t go over. When I made it to the board I grabbed the underside of it to get an idea on how low I’d have to go and used it to pull myself under. When I came back up I had the worst head rush I’ve ever had. Think of it as eating an entire carton of ice cream in one bite, but only you don’t get any of the enjoyment out of the taste of ice cream. That one knocked me out a bit and my KISA could tell I was uneasy. He asked if I needed to take a break, but I’m stubborn and refused. We decided maybe running would be the best to help warm my body up again, which it seemed to.

At this point in time I realized we weren’t even 1/10 of the way done and only 3/19 done with the obstacles. I had a moment of silent panic, especially as I remembered that I’d have to do the Kiss of Mud obstacle another time later in the course. But, for some crazy reason I found that my body somehow adapted and the obstacles no longer seemed like a big deal, nor did the running.

The rest of the obstacles were as follows:

1. Just the Tip – I don’t really understand the name of this obstacle, but it was walls set up going across a pool of water. There’s a board going across the top for you to hold onto and then three little boards on the bottom to make it the first foot of the wall. However, the next eight feet you have to hang and go across holding onto the tiny 2×4’s with your feet dangling. Since we were so early in the waves everyone was making it across, even the girls (or at least the ones that tried it). My pride got the best of me and I miraculously made it across. I’m not sure who was more surprised – my KISA or me.
2. Logjammin – This obstacle was pretty simple and basic – you have some logs about 3’ high you had to climb over and some logs so high you had about 3’ to crawl under them. Obstacles like this made you thankful you were a girl and nimble, especially in seeing some of the men struggle.
3. Lumberjacked – This obstacle was a little harder. It was also with logs, but instead of them being a few feet high, they were 7’ or 8’ high. And, unlike the smooth wall, these were actual logs with bark on them that scraped you. My KISA boosted me up on his knee and I struggled, but succeed in getting my leg over the log, only to scrape the inside of my thigh in doing so. I then watched as my KISA attempted in vain to jump up to the log and pull himself over. There were literally only a couple of guys that were able to do it solo, so when he made his final jump another guy and I ran to grab his legs and give him an extra hoist. Oh, and you do this again on a second log.
4. Trench Warfare – I mentioned in my last posting that I don’t do well in small spaces. Trench Warfare is an obstacle of mazes where you crawl on the ground with a board and soil overtop of you. It still makes my heart race just thinking about it. My KISA offered to go in behind me in case I panicked and reminded me to take deep breaths out of my nose to avoid panicking (and I think he also wanted an excuse to check out what all these hills in SF have been doing for my behind). I shook the entire time I crawled through it and found I picked up the pace as I could see the light at the end and wanted to get the hell out.
5. Electric Eel – The electric eel is basically a slip-n-slide, on flat ground, and with electrical currents zapping you. I got as much of a sliding start as I could muster and then army crawled my way to the end. This is where the cow prodder experience was put to use.
6. Berlin Walls – These are 10-12’ walls with nowhere to grab or grip your footing, except at the base. Some guys tried getting a running start, but it didn’t seem to matter. This is where it was again nice to be a girl and just have a guy lift you up and then have you step on their shoulders to get your legs over. The only downfall is jumping to get back down. Not gonna lie – on the second one I landed on a big pile of woodchips and fell backwards.
7. Kiss of Mud (II) – This one was a little better than the first one since there was more water on it, but you’re still army crawling on the hard ground with rocks and sticks poking at you and barbed wire above you (which ripped my KISA’s shirt…apparently he wasn’t low enough).
8. Boa Constrictor – This is the one I warned you all about last week that I was most terrified of. What I hadn’t realized was that there’s an opening between the two tubes for a few feet with light. However, that doesn’t mean there was a lot of space at the end of the first tunnel or the beginning of the second one with all the water.
9. Funky Monkey – These are monkey bars that go gradually up and then gradually back down. Since my KISA’s buff he had no problem making it across. I made it to the fourth rung before falling into the water. But, it was a rung before the red-headed guy next to me that thought he was tough. He obviously was not.
   

   The end of Mud Mile

10. Mud Mile – This obstacle was deceiving harder than it looked. You had about six huge mounds of mud, separated by mud pits that went up to your chest. Between trying to get footing to climb up the mounds and getting your feet stuck in the mud it provided a bit of challenge. Plus you also have to get back down the mounds back into the water. At one point in time I gave the guy behind me permission to touch my butt to hoist me up the mound when I wasn’t having luck. And he did.
11. Hold Your Wood – This is at a half a mile of carrying a log. It seemed easy at first, but I realized it was because we were going downhill. Once we started back on the uphill loop I realized it was kind of heavy.
12. Walk the Plank – I’ve cliff-dived before and jumped off a bridge, so this should be easy. You’re on a platform 18’ above a mud bath that you have to jump into. Thankfully the ladies at the top did a countdown for me to make it easier. It wasn’t until after I did it that I learned someone died in the WV Tough Mudder doing it (they drowned). I’m glad to know that information afterwards.
    

    Jumping off Walk the Plank

13. Cage Crawl – This obstacle looks scarier than it is. You’re in a track filled with water, but they leave maybe a foot between the top of the water and the cage. You get in on your back and grab onto the cage to keep your head above the water. The only tricky parts were getting in and getting out.
14. Warrior Carry – This was my favorite! In this obstacle you’re to carry your partner for half of it and then switch. My KISA being the gentleman he is just carried me through all of it while yelling, “I’m going to get you outta here!”
15. Everest – Everest is a quarter pipe (as in what the snowboarders do tricks on) that you have to run and then jump to get onto. My biggest fear was that I’d run and then splatter against the side of it and slide back down. Thankfully my KISA and another guy caught me. Unlike the girl that went after me who did was I was worried to do.
16. Electroshock Therapy – Last, but not least, is the famous obstacle that you run through and get shocked. Now, I thought that you could just run really fast. What I didn’t realize is that they make it muddy and swampy on the bottom to add an extra challenge. My KISA wanted us to be done by noon and right as we were ready to go through he informed me it was 11:59, so we had no choice and ran. Since he was next to me and I was only worried about myself, I didn’t realize that he fell at the end…and continued to get shocked. Probably better off or I would have fallen over laughing and gotten shocked as well.
    

    Electroshock Therapy

After we got done we hosed off, hung out for a bit, and then headed back. We learned from the bus driver that we were one of the first ones (and were the only ones on her bus). It kinda made us feel bad-ass. We got back to the car and scrubbed some more with baby wipes in knowing we’d need to grab some lunch. We also stopped at a CVS to get my darling knees some instant ice packs. We both LOVED it and actually thoroughly enjoyed it. It was a good physical and mental challenge.

Crossing the finish line

I love this guy

As I’ve mentioned, I’m doing a full marathon October 20^th. If that weren’t enough, I also decided last week that I’m doing a half marathon in two weeks from Saturday. Crazy, right? Well, I forgot to mention one other race I’m doing: Tough Mudder, this Saturday. For those of you not familiar with what Tough Mudder is, it’s essentially a brutally challenging obstacle course for 10-12 miles…at altitude (it’s in Tahoe). My KISA and I like to go big or go home, so why not pick the toughest Tough Mudder they offer, right? He likes to consider it preparing for the end of the world. I’m pretty sure I’ll be eaten by the zombies, unless they walk super slowly like in the movies. Then I don’t understand how anyone is eaten unless you are asleep and couldn’t hear them coming. I digress.

So, what do I mean by obstacles? Well, diving into an ice water bath, climbing over walls, running through burning bales, carrying logs up a hill, and lots of crawling through mud. Sounds, like fun, right? At the end you are also shocked. And, not like surprised shocked, but electrical shocks. For most people, this is the part they dread the most. Not me – we used to shock each other with cow prodders growing up or would touch electric fences we didn’t know where on, so I know it sucks, but it’s not anything I haven’t endured. The part I’m dreading the most is called boa constrictor. In this event you’re in tubes going uphill that are filled with mud and water up to your chest as you crawl through, one person after another. I can sometimes be claustrophobic, so I’m pretty confident I’ll have a nervous breakdown during this part. I’ll make sure to have my emergency contact information on my necklace. And, I absolutely won’t be able to climb the walls or cross the monkey bar things. This is where my KISA comes in. He’ll be carrying and pulling me through these parts. That’s true love.

One of the predicaments I’ve realized is that I’m supposed to be doing a 10 mile run on Saturday in preparation for the half marathon. And, doing 10-12 miles of obstacles is definitely challenging, but not exactly the same thing. So, that gives me no choice but to do both. Only on different days (I’m not THAT insane). Tomorrow before work I’ll be completing my 10 mile run. Then excessively icing my knees, and doing Tough Mudder on Saturday. FML.

My KISA and I spent the 4th of July on inner tubes, going down the Russian River. It was in the triple digits, so it felt nice being in the cool water. Like a health-conscious person, I put on sunscreen and had even purchased the sport version for the occasion since it’s waterproof. The California sun didn’t give a crap about the sunscreen and I still got burned.

I’ve been proud of how healthy I’ve been eating and working out consistently. Well, you know how sometimes you feel more in shape that what you really are? I got a strong dose of this yesterday when I realized that my stomach was burned…except the white stripes I had from where the rolls on my stomach overlapped. Whoops! I guess I have some more work to do. Let’s hope when this burn turns into a tan it evens out.

I fell hard-core off the being healthy bandwagon. When I fell off I got a concussion, so I’ve been recovering. Don’t get me wrong – I really want to be healthy and skinny and fit. But why does it have to be so much…work?

I ran on Thursday. And then convinced my KISA that I needed a rest day Friday. Saturday I was just tired. Sunday I just didn’t want to. Monday it was raining. Today? I was tired and it was raining. But, then I remembered that I paid $200 to run a marathon (in the city, and possibly streets, I run in every day for free). Ugh. Why do I get 30 seconds of thinking something is a good idea and then whip out the credit card? I really need to do that whole freezing the card in the freezer so that I really have to think about things before I use it on anything healthy. And require myself in the time in melts to run laps around the block. By the time it thaws if I think I want to pay money to be healthy, then I can use it. If not, I can just go shopping. Preferably at an outlet mall.

Today I did a 5 mile run. Back in the day that wouldn’t have been a big deal. But, being 30 and unfit it was a big deal. Now my legs ache. Oh, and I ate healthy today. I even ate a salad and decided to forgo chocolate. That should make up for me not exercising or eating healthy for the rest of the week, right?

You can’t tell in the picture, but I’m soaked. As in, clothes sticking to me, hating life soaked.

I normally have a 2.5 hour RT commute a day (bike to the train, take the train to the valley, bike to work; repeat backwards), but today I get to work from home! So, I spent the first extra hour getting 9 hours of solid sleep. As in I didn’t even hear my KISA come home last night, or hear him wake up this morning; I was unconscious. And, I woke up feeling great! This afternoon I’m going to get a manicure for a friend’s wedding this weekend and then a 60 minute foot and full body Chinese massage (that is only $30 here in the city!). Wahoo!!

Gotta run…literally!

Monday was a big day for me, health-wise. I have a friend in Boulder that is a personal trainer and nutritionist. She reached out to me to see if I’d be willing to join her 25 day challenge for June.

The 25 day challenge consists of having Shakeology replacement for one of my meals, and then doing a circuit training workout. For some reason she thought Insanity would fit me well. Also on this plan, you are to eat clean, unprocessed foods. Sounds easy enough, right?

Oh, did I mention that I also decided to sign up for the San Francisco Nike Marathon? And, that training also started on Monday. (At first I thought I was crazy to do a full marathon here in SF with the hills, but then I heard you get a Tiffany necklace if you complete it. No. Brainer.)

Needless to say, I’m sleeping really well.

Post workout on Day 2. I’m not gonna lie – I was in just a sports bra and shorts and had all the windows open. And, I still sweat everywhere.

My lunch and snacks for today. Eating clean.

Since moving to San Francisco I have dropped at least 5 lbs (I haven’t weighed myself for a while, though, so hopefully it’s more) and 1-2 pants sizes, depending on the brand. It makes me feel good when my coworkers notice I’ve lost inches (even though I’ve only been here 3 months) and I no longer have to dress in layers to hide my midsection or muffin top.

Now, I know I’ve never been “fat”. And, I’m not complaining at all about how I looked – I just knew I could look better. In doing so I read a lot of articles, consulted people that were already fit and healthy, subscribed to a friend’s fitness webpage, and scoured Pinterest. I wanted to share with you some of the biggest “AH-HA” moments or motivations for me.

1. You lose weight by having a calorie deficit. You create a calorie deficit by consuming fewer calories than the calories you burn for the day. This can be done by either cutting calories or adding more cardio to your workout (or, even faster, a combination of both). However, your body will not respond if you eat less than 1200 calories a day because it will go into starvation mode.
2. Muscle doesn’t replace fat. If you start lifting weights and doing strength training, it’s great because it will strengthen your muscles and you’ll notice how much easier things become. However, don’t expect to lose weight or inches from only strength training. You need to combine with eating healthy and/or cardio.
3. Cardio makes you burn calories, eating in moderation helps create a calorie deficit, and strength training helps you look good and toned. (If you’ve ever seen skinny fat people and you’ll understand why they need to lift weights.) You need to do all 3 or else you won’t get the results you’re seeking as easily.
4. Don’t crash diet or take weight-loss pills. These are great for instant gratification, but you have to maintain the crash diet or the pills if you want to maintain the results. Plus it won’t make you feel good like a work-out or healthy food does.
5. Cut out sugar and sweeteners. Sugar is empty calories and does nothing for you, even though you may believe it makes you feel more satisfied. Sweeteners don’t have calories, but instead makes you hungry, which then makes you consume more calories. Instead, replace them with fruit to get that sweet fulfillment you’re seeking.
6. Drink only water. Water has no calories and makes you feel full. Plus, any other drink (even apple juice, orange juice, etc.) has so many sweeteners in it that it’s again, empty calories.
7. Cutting out starches will allow you to see the biggest results in your stomach. You’ll notice within a couple of days that it’s flatter and less bloated. You can replace a lot of your favorite starches with healthier foods that taste the same. For example, crushed cauliflower instead of potatoes, spaghetti squash instead of spaghetti, almonds instead of Ritz crackers, etc.
8. Take rest days from working out. I know it sounds opposite of what you’d think, but a rest day actually does a lot for you. If you work out every day your muscles become fatigued. After taking a rest day you’ll find you can handle more and are stronger than you used to be. But, only take 2-3 rest days a week or else you’ll find every day is a rest day.
9. Plan! If you plan your meals and workouts for the week you’re more likely to stick with them. And, after you plan your meals, go grocery shopping for everything you’d need that week. Once you know what lunch you’re going to pack and what you’re going to make for dinner, you’ll find you’re more likely to eat healthy. The same goes for if you plan your workouts for the week you’ll spend less time at the gym because you’ll know what you’re doing.
10. It takes 4 weeks before you notice the difference in yourself. It takes 6 weeks for family or people close to you to notice. And, it takes 8 weeks for others to notice. You can literally mark these dates on a calendar. If you’ve just started with a new fitness or nutrition regime, give it 8 weeks to truly see if it’s working before quitting.

My knight in shining armor jokes all the time about how I couldn’t pass The President’s Challenge Physical Fitness Test. Ok, so he’s right. However, in my defense I couldn’t do them when I was a child either. I don’t know if you remember having to do “The Mile” in gym class. I always walked it. Or else the shuttle run, that I dislocated my kneecap doing in 8th grade (it got me out of having to do them again). The only one I was ever good at was the V-sit reach. Mostly because it didn’t require any athletic ability, only flexibility.

Well, I can do all of them now, except a pull-up. Some women think it doesn’t sound that hard and they can do it, but when was the last time you really tried? You might surprise yourself as they’re super difficult. For men it’s easy because they naturally have upper body strength. In March I declared that I would be able to one pull-up by my 30th birthday, on May 10th. At that point in time my knight didn’t even believe I could do a push-up, much less a pull-out. However, I’ve proven him wrong on that. Mostly. I still can’t touch my chin like he wants to, but I can do them. And not on my knees, like I’d like to be able to.

My 30th is now just over a month away and I’m realizing that may be a more far fetched goal than I’d hoped. Thankfully, there is a machine at the gym to help you learn how to do a pull-up. You put in the weight of resistance that you want. Now, it’s backwards to what you’d think. Let’s say if you weight 150 lbs, you might start with the machine at 150 lbs so that there’s no resistance  Then you gradually add less weight, which means that you’re lifting more of your weight rather than the machine doing it for you. So, you grab a hold of the bar at the top, stand on the platform (which lowers and makes you feel self-conscience), and then pull yourself up. It sounds simple, but it’s really not. I’m realizing how much of a wuss I am and that maybe my 31st birthday might be more realistic. I’ll keep you posted!